Sometimes you have to remind yourself to keep going…

We all get stuck sometimes. We all fail or make mistakes throughout our journeys of finding ourselves. Many times we slip up and back track when we should be pressing forward. Inconsistency has become my middle name. I have suddenly become a consistent failure. The small amount of goals that I have achieved were only because I had given up at least 20 times before I finally achieved my goal. My day to day agenda revolves around planning my life. I plan what I will eat, when I will clean, what car I will be driving in the near future, what I will go to school for, if I will or will not become a doctor, how I will lose thiss tremendous amount of weight thst has latched onto me like the Pizza Hut I just devoured last night.

I could plan my whole future in a notebook and not follow through with any of it. Why? If I plan, then I will be prepared, but you’re only prepared when you follow through with your plans. Again I ask myself, why not follow through?

Pure and complete LAZINESS!I’m usually very blunt and to the point anyways. There so I answered my own question! It is the one thing that makes me different from those who are successful. It’s always easier to give up than to keep going, and I have always been one to take the 100% risk free, easy route! Yet since it is so easy, I am usually the one who misses out. When you don’t take risks you cannot become truly successful. Not the kind of successful I imagine being anyways. Have you ever met someone who was partially driven? Well you met her now! I can do everything a driven and organized person can do but DRIVE!

So how do I stop this trainwreck? How do I become more of what I want to be. Start somewhere…anywhere…just not here.

So I chose to start with one of the biggest challenges of my life, which is my weight. Being overweight has many more challenges to overcome other than just how heavy you are. It is a physical, mental and emotional thing that you have to overcome. Before I started on my career, I wanted to challenge myself physically by achieving this goal. I’ve never had to challenge myself physically, so this is going to be one of the hardest things ever.

I said that I would document my weight loss journey and I wanted anyone who was going through these same set backs to know that we still have to keep going. I want to look back at this blog post and remember how defeated and hopeless I felt.

Popcorn & Halloween Madness

What a wonderful week of fun! From Frozen On Ice to Halloween Parade fun! Children really do live the life! My daughters went to an awesome Halloween parade last night. It was the first Halloween parade any of us had ever attended and it was quite the experience. So many families and businesses come out and decorate their cars or create floats for the parade. It kind of got me excited to do one. The cutest one I seen was the toddler in a little jail cell, with his prison uniform on. He was behind bars and it had said Wanted for taking all the cookies! Too cute! I wish I would have taken a picture.

Disney On Ice recently came into town and my girls were able to see their favorite movie on ice, FROZEN! Hell, even I was excited. The show was amazing. My girls have been to three of the Disney On Ice shows and this one blew me away. You could tell that they put alot of effort in those costumes. They played the whole movie out on the ice, it was amazing.

Of course, whenever you attend any disney event, the prices are ridiculously expensive. Thirty-eight dollars for 3 Cotton Candy Bags! REALLY? Who in there right mind would want to spend almost forty bucks on COTTON CANDY! We complained and stomped our feet, but the girls stomped theirs even more. We didn’t get the cotton candy, but we did get some snow cones that came in Olaf cups (we have been using them at home) and a bag of popcorn. Another funny moment was when we finally got our $16 Olaf snow cups, ten minutes later one of my kids drop it on the ground! *blank stare*

Unfortunately when the event was over that chaos began, as we were rushing to the car my daughter drops the bag of popcorn and has a melt down! GREAT! To this day she keeps telling me we have to go back to Disney On Ice so we can find her bag of popcorn. LOL! Aren’t kids just adorable?

Mommynista?

I’ve never been the girl to have coolest things in high school. I looked decent, but I was never on trend. I would always see the same group of girls with the latest sneakers on. Or even the same group of girls with the UGG boots. I wanted them so bad, but for $150? My mother would simply pause, laugh hysterically, and then tell me the list of bills she had to pay. My mother never had much and even though my father had a tad bit more, he was never one to spend $150 on a “trend”.

Fast forward several years after graduating, I still want those same shoes that no one would buy me when I was in high school. The fact that I see women in their 40s wearing these boots that I craved for when I was younger makes me a tad jealous. There are obviously knock off boots that I could buy, BUT I WANT THESE! After all of these years, I still get this shoppers craving when I see these cool trends come and go. Why is the real question? Is it the fashionista in me that has been hidden under layers and layers of adulthood and mommydom! I’ve been an Old Navy shopper since I had children. All I rock are mom jeans and oversized tee shirts since I put on all of the baby weight. Wait, can it still be baby weight if my youngest are almost 4? Anyways, why on earth am I so concerned about being stylish now?

I guess after years of changing poopy diapers, constantly having spit up, formula, breast milk and sometimes poo on my shirts, I no longer want to simply dressy comfortably. I want to be a stylish momma all the time. Not only on special occasions. The twins have been potty trained for several months now. Im not nearly as busy as I used to be. The pulled back ponytails are starting to cause some serious balding around my edges anyways. Time to stop being lazy and start taking care of myself, because I do care. My chipped nail polish has been the same for months and I haven’t even attempted to fix it. *sigh* Life as a busy momma! I guess I’ll fix myself up for a nice breakfast. Maybe even put lotion and perfume on!!! I’m such a sad case.

Lazy Fitness!

A proper daily workout is going to be my pitfall. I cannot stay consistent with ANYTHING, other than eating every darn day! Fitness has been a daily struggly for me and I can’t wrap my brain around the fact that I NEED TO BE FIT! From the crappy foods I consistently indulge in, to the lazy couch and my favorite reality shows. Sometimes after work all you want to do is rest, not workout.
I am trying to stay consistent with it all, but it is hard work! I will be posting my fitness journey on my blog. Hopefully, this is another thing that helps me stay motivated because my personal to do list journal doesn’t help.
I have 100 pounds to lose, and my goal was to lose a nice chunk of it by Christmas. I am tired of avoiding the holiday group photos because of my weight gain. No one wants to see that LOL! This year, we are once again doing the matching family pajamas. Last year, I split my silk pajama pants while helping the kids unwrap gifts…so embarrassing. I had to change into leggings before the rest of the family got there. *sigh* Those pajamas were really cute too!
I really want to document this journey because I want to be able to visually see the transformation and see how emotional I was during this whole process. Usually when I see peoples fitness journey they tell you how they did it AFTER THE FACT. They tell you how they stay fit NOW, not THEN. I want to document my daily workouts and fitness achievements.
It is a new month and everyone who knows about Blogilates knows that there was a new calendar sent to everyone for the month of October. So after being a few days late, I decided to start on Monday. Whatever her name is tried to literally kick my butt. We did over 100 waist dippers. Has she gone nuts! I am a beginner. My hips and thighs are killing me, yet I am thanking her at the same time. Since I cannot go to the gym because of my kids and small time frame after work, I have been craving for the pain that they gave me when I used to go to LA Fitness. I thought that I would be able to feel that same pain when I was doing Focus T25, but that was a $130 mistake. Oops! I am also doing Couch 2 5k. We will see how that goes, because this is my 3rd time doing it and not being consistent with the workout. Pray for me! I will be posting up pictures soon of my before and my inches. I have to track this somewhere. LOL!

Medical School?

Whew! Haven’t been on here in a while! I had high hopes of being this extreme blogger, but its certainly not working the way I wanted it to. My laptop is broken and my warranty is expired. Womp Womp! My dad warned me years ago that HP laptops will eventually start to over heat if you choose not to use it on a hard surface like a dining table. Well of course, I didn’t listen and now my laptop is in R.I.P status. It still turns on but it doesn’t turn on for long. Time for a new one. I really wanted to invest in an iMAC or a Macbook Pro since I have desperately been wanting to vlog on youtube. But we may have to wait a while.
I’ve finally decided to blog while at work! Since the laptop is out of business, this is a great way to make the work day go by faster even though I should be cherishing my short lunch hour.
I have recently been very interested in “Mommy Medical School Blogs” (what I call it) I have found another mom on the move and it inspires me so much to see that these moms can do it.
Ever since I was a little girl I have always been passionate about becoming an obstetrician. But as I became older and started dressing up my barbie dolls, my doctor dreams shortly turned into fashion designer dreams. Now that I am a college drop out with 3 kids, that dream seems so far fetched.
I even thought that the dream of becoming a doctor would be too far fetched since I wouldn’t be a traditional medical school student. But after much research and the many “mommy medical school blogs” that I have been reading, it looks as if anyone who is determined can do it. I would love to deliver babies for a living. I had such an amazing experience having my own, it seems like an awesome career to have.

In the meantime, lets start at square one with trying to get back in school and convince my boyfriend that I should be a full-time college student. One step at a time…